At the time I was pissed, I had just been guilted to sell my entire VanHalen tape collection to the used record store so I could only listen to Christian rock music. But little did my parents know I would start middle school and meet friends that would introduce me to punk and alt rock. It would end up being an internal safeguard against fundamentalism and cause me lots of cognitive dissonance. It would also help me 20 years later to appreciate the high church liturgy of my new Lutheran church.
The introspection of The Smiths allowed me to realize life was a bummer sometimes and you could revel in it. Minor Threat allowed a way to blow off steam when my church friends would redediacte their lives and leave me behind when I would listen to "Filler". Thanks to the evangelical fear of rock music in the 80's, I was introduced to a new genre of music that would make me a much deeper thinker. It is a blessing and curse since what gave me solace also put me at odds with all the schmucks in the bible belt town I grew up in.
So many people in my current locale check their brains at the door in all aspects of their lives and want an expert to tell them what to think and beleive. When you think for yourself and stand alone you start to second guess yourself and try to assimilate to placate family members. It is tough to embrace your calling as a leader and have the confidence to move fprward. Especially when it threatens the status quo in your family and points out where they have accepted mediocrity in their lives.
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